Thursday, March 1, 2012

Is Orange The New White?

There is an epidemic (or maybe it's an addiction) of people sporting really, really, REALLY bad tans.

I call this the George Hamil-Tan effect. Some refer to these people as tanorexics; just like an anorexic can't be too thin, these people can't be too tan.

Well, let me just say, yes. Yes you CAN be too tan.

Here is George in his hay day, the pioneer of the Hamil-Tan.

And as you can see, he hasn't been cured of his addiction all these years later.

Now the epidemic has spread like the plague, tanning salons the rabid squirrels propagating the illness.

Exhibit #1:

Normally this guy's outfit would be screaming for attention but in this case, his deep betacarotene pallor  overshadows the hot pink tie. And honestly, all I can think of is Halloween and carving jack-o-lanterns.

Exhibit #2:

The darker the skin, the paler the hair.

Exhibit #3:

Again, the skin-to-hair contrast seems to be symptomatic of the George Hamil-Tan disease. I hope she is drinking chemo meds cuz she's gonna need them.

Exhibit #4:

The epidemic strikes at a young age, resulting in pointy headedness in males.

I like a little color on my skin but never strive for the Hamil-Tan effect.


Cuz orange is not a pretty color on human skin. Except for Oompa Loompas.

Cuz it gives you skin cancer and wrinkles and it's just plain unattractive.

Back away from the tanning salon, peeps. You'll be much healthier and better looking for it.

For more bad tans, visit Pale Is The New Tan Blog.

Labels: , ,


Post a Comment

Subscribe to Post Comments [Atom]

<< Home